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Chairmans’ Transfer week Survival Kit:
Top Ten Items
Increasingly transfer survival kits are being relied upon by all and sundry in the PL to help see pressured harassed Chairman through a gruelling last week of the window.
However, with just the right amount of tools and supplies they can make it through a challenging nerve jangling fingernail biting experience.
The items a chairman chooses to carry with him as he jets abroad, runs to the office and sticks a phone in each ear whilst also on a conference call to the bank may vary widely depending on his physical and mental fitness.
Recent performances from our very own Chairmen would suggest that as age catches up with him he’s prone to flagging in the last few days.
Our recent windows have been full of promise, only for the manager to be left to explain why we can’t afford any of our targets and why we targeted 120 different players in every window.
Nothing can replace the value of basic Premier League Chairman’s survival training. Having knowledge of natural fan shelter-building, putting out fires, agent purification, and common wild speculative bidding can go a long way.
The list below illustrates the top ten picks for core items to consider including in Transfer window last week survival kits.
1. Energy drinks – administered regularly, item 2 becomes unnecessary.
2. Sleeping bag
3. Fax machine with auto low bid setting
4. Three Mobile phones with three spare batteries; none with message answering switched on.
5. Auto translator; incredibly some foreign billionaire owners still don’t speak English.
6. Access to online banking; saying you’ve left the cheque book in the office doesn’t wash anymore.
7. Updated 1996 Standard PowerPoint presentation showing how we aim to win the PL in ten years. (Agents and players love it).
8. Legal aids that never sleeps, unless slipped a mickey by the chairmans aid, comes in handy when playing for extra time.
9. A pen with ink. Saying oops! I can’t sign this my lucky pen has run out of ink doesn’t wash.
10. A steady outlet to ITK’s just so that you can prepare the fans.
Chairmans’ Transfer week Survival Kit:
Top Ten Items
Increasingly transfer survival kits are being relied upon by all and sundry in the PL to help see pressured harassed Chairman through a gruelling last week of the window.
However, with just the right amount of tools and supplies they can make it through a challenging nerve jangling fingernail biting experience.
The items a chairman chooses to carry with him as he jets abroad, runs to the office and sticks a phone in each ear whilst also on a conference call to the bank may vary widely depending on his physical and mental fitness.
Recent performances from our very own Chairmen would suggest that as age catches up with him he’s prone to flagging in the last few days.
Our recent windows have been full of promise, only for the manager to be left to explain why we can’t afford any of our targets and why we targeted 120 different players in every window.
Nothing can replace the value of basic Premier League Chairman’s survival training. Having knowledge of natural fan shelter-building, putting out fires, agent purification, and common wild speculative bidding can go a long way.
The list below illustrates the top ten picks for core items to consider including in Transfer window last week survival kits.
1. Energy drinks – administered regularly, item 2 becomes unnecessary.
2. Sleeping bag
3. Fax machine with auto low bid setting
4. Three Mobile phones with three spare batteries; none with message answering switched on.
5. Auto translator; incredibly some foreign billionaire owners still don’t speak English.
6. Access to online banking; saying you’ve left the cheque book in the office doesn’t wash anymore.
7. Updated 1996 Standard PowerPoint presentation showing how we aim to win the PL in ten years. (Agents and players love it).
8. Legal aids that never sleeps, unless slipped a mickey by the chairmans aid, comes in handy when playing for extra time.
9. A pen with ink. Saying oops! I can’t sign this my lucky pen has run out of ink doesn’t wash.
10. A steady outlet to ITK’s just so that you can prepare the fans.
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