BUBBLE BLOWERS ON PARKER

This article is well worth a read it was posted on thegamesgonecrazy.blogspot.com

THE CRAZY WORLD OF WEST HAM UNITED!


Picture the scene. The Sulliedone faced with Avram's demands for a new keeper, a right back, a new left winger and a new striker demands, "Where do you think the money will come from? It don't grow on bleedin' trees." Just then the phone rings. The receptionist says, "It's Mr Levy sir." Sullivan asks her to put him on hold.
"It's Levy," whispers Basher. "It's probably an improved offer for Parker."
Avram noods sagely. "Just as we expected."
"But I've promised the fans," whispers Basher.
"But he hasn't signed that contract has he?" asks Avram. "He didn't make much difference at Villa did he?"
"True. Very true. If they offer ten?" asks the Sulliedone.
"I think they'll go to twelve."
"How about ten and O'Hara on loan for the season?"
"Subject to medical, it would be a goodish deal," replies Avram.
"How about Hutton and O'Hara on loan plus £10million?"
"That would be a better deal."
"How about Hutton and O'Hara on loan and £10million and they take Spector off our hands?"
"Can't see them agreeing to that."
"True. Very true. How about Keane, Hutton and O'Hara on loan plus £8million?"
"I would snap Levy's arm off for that!"
"So," says David. We can find a way of making the deal work. Now Karren has told the press that Tottenham turned Scotty's head with that offer. How about we let him keep his cut of the transfer if he asks for a transfer. Nothing in writing. Just a nod and a wink, you know the sort of thing. Then when he's gone, welsh on the deal, see him in court if he dares. What do you think?"
"Sounds like a plan," replies Avram.
"And with the money you could buy Prince Fingermebob from Pompey and...well how do you fancy Bellamy?"
"Sounds good."
"And then if Liverpool give us £15million for Cole?"
"Well Tottenham won't be able to afford Remy anymore so..."
"I was thinking more in terms of a loan deal or two and a two or three million keeper. Remember, we are £100million in debt. What do you REALLY need to keep us up? Remember, West Brom, Blackpool and Wigan are in the division and Steve Bruce is due another relegation and Birmingham aint all that and Newcastle will be stuffed on Monday night...Hang on. Ah, Mr Levy, now then, let's talk business..."
POSTED BY HAMMERSFAN AT 15:20